11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
