you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
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