Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
