she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
MIDGETS
????
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize