Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize