Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Randomize
