can we get nightvision for the apartment?
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
