just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
