we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
