This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Randomize
