It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
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