I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
After tacos, we're chasing women.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
