i was rollin on her like bob the builder
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
