So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
