I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I don't think brook has ever known best
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
