her vagine was all disorganized.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Randomize
