This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
