carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
how do you play pong handcuffed?
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
