I'm laying in your front yard are you home
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
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