ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
