Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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