I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize