i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
