I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
