OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
