THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
