I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
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