After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
