make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
