Where is the hickey?
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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