i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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