Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
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