my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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