I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
