He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
