Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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