I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Randomize
