I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
