So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
