Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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