It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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