You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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