Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
i dont even know how to be here
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
