so that wasnt chicken after all
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Operation Purity has been aborted
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Randomize
