all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
The cops high fived after they tackled you
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
God, I missed his penis.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
