I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
P.S. I can't hear my feet
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
