I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
