Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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