YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
