So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Randomize
